Some bored statisticians worked out that today is statistically the most miserable day of the year, quite fitting then that I spent most of it in floods of tears.
The twist of course is that I was enjoying myself more and more with every sob. I spent today working as a sub for a spanking company and other than having a slightly warm, tight feeling bum right now had a perfect day, especially in their school uniform. I love being bratty, maybe because I work so hard on being tolerant and slightly submissive to people in real life - I hate argument situations, don't get me wrong, given the right circumstances I will scream and dish it out like queen of the nasties but I tend to giggle or appease such opportunities off. Either way I was my own worse enemy today, always answering back in defense of made up accusations being thrown at me, forcing Miss Simpson to tell me to bend over again for 'one last hit', over and over. One scene went on 2 minutes more than planned because of this.
I was once told that sobbing at the end of a spanking film is like the cum shot in regular porn, its the event that people will see as the point to hold out for and release. I would also like to add that if you start crying early on you tend not to get hit as hard, as people are worried that they might be really upsetting you (lazy model trick number 5).
The best thing about crying though is the amazing feeling of relief it offers. Crying is such a large charge of emotion and you feel drained afterwards because of this, its like I imagine taking certain drugs must be like, just a huge rush of feelings all at once with a tired but satisfied feeling afterwards. (How middles class and out of touch dose my idea of drugs read, I am so down with the kids). I don't know if this is just a female thing but do you ever have moments where you deliberately watch a film knowing it will make you cry, as you just feel that you need to have one and then you feel so much better afterwards, like you have drained stress and worry that you didn't even know you had? Possibly that's what people get out of religious confessing etc. On a slightly unrelated note if you have this feeling or just want a good mini film to watch, can I suggest Mary and Max. This is such a lovely animation, and its based on real events. It is in a style I hadn't seen before and anything that champions the chocolate hot dog can only be a good thing. (see trailer in link bellow)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MgRjB8PEDkM
It would take to long for me to talk you through all 20 of the scenes we shot today but I will talk you through my favourite two and promise to put pics and links up when I am given them.
The first scene was the last one we shot. I told on another girl (Fay) who had just used bad language and then watched as Miss Simpson put her over her knee and spanked her for being such a 'potty mouth'. After Fay is sent out I go to follow, only to be pulled over the same knee and punished for telling tales. They wanted big tears to finish and as I was told it was, 'no wonder you don't have any friends' I sobbed my guts up. They even changed the ending so I get a cuddle at the end. - You know how much I like snuggles.
The other scene was a good old fashioned beating the devil out of you scene. Those of you who have watched my Abby Winters solo scene will know that for some unknown reason I have always found the idea of someone in such a position of power, abusing the bibles teachings to get their sexual kicks strangly errotic so having bible quotes hurled as me while I was spanked was clearly always going to please. I have just used a dildo to orgasm when my guardian (it always has to be so obscure for spanking videos to get around all the laws. The person spanking you has to be in a position of power or you wouldn't let them do it but equally you have to obviously avoid any hints at incest or clues that the model could be under 18) walks in and asks why I am not ready for church. He sees the toy and I break down sobbing, asking why I cant stop feeling the urge to touch myself and asking why I am being tempted - I am a bad christian who needs help so I take a spanking and agree not to wear any cloths on my lower half for a week so people can check I am not touching myself.
I spent yesterday down at the yard to help move alot of electric fencing in the cold and Poppy finally got to meet some puppies. I also spotted another beautiful place, although it was much better off camera to add to my new lovely view vlog spot. I am off doing more secret filming tomorrow (so long as my bums gone down a bit) then I get a well earned proper day off. I am so sorry facebook people for not having looked at any mail for so long, its the first thing for me to do when I have slept next week, I have been thinking of you but just havent had time. x x
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